On Being a Baha’i: When not to be nice
By george wesley dannells on Dec 28, 2008 in All categories
There is a zinger thrown at Baha’is that I’ve had stuck in my head for years that goes like this: ”Baha’is suffer from terminal niceness.” I’ve written about this before. According to the post below, when can a Baha’i say, “No more Mr. Nice Guy”? Apparently, nev-ah. -gw
I am Baha’i. That means I have to be nice no matter what. But where do I draw the line?
I’m not afraid to speak my mind, and I’ve always been so influenced by the power of words, especially negative ones.
But I’m beginning to realize the real power comes from self control, from being able to hold your tongue despite how someone else treats you and be courteous and loving no matter how they behave. THAT is real strength. And even if they don’t see it at the time, the long term gratification of knowing you have established yourself as a good hearted person with your strength coming from your character is overwhelming.
Sometimes I really do feel like a Baha’i.
To be honest, I have a dilemma that I really, REALLY don’t know how to solve. It’s one of those situations where I get mad at God and go, “Now SEE what you did! You just COULDN’T let me be a mind reader so I could leave you alone and figure this out for myself, noooooo, you just had to play, well.. God..” And then I just feel like an idiot. I need to PRAY! PRAY FOR ME!
Chelsea and the Flying Pink Monkeys of Doom
Image: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:IchigoAnimeEp113.jpg
On Dec 29, 2008, Artist Victoria O'Neill said:
being truthful may usurp being nice. I dont’ see where it’s really so much of a virtue to hold your tongue when somebody is mistreating you. You can speak kindly, but firmly and even say something as simple and direct as “I just can’t let you talk to me like this. what can we do to make this situation better?”
On Dec 29, 2008, Rebecca said:
Actually there is one exception I found in the writings:
˝The foundation of the Kingdom of God is laid upon justice, fairness, mercy, sympathy and kindness to every soul. Then strive ye with heart and soul to practice love and kindness to the world of humanity at large, except to those souls who are selfish and insincere. It is not advisable to show kindness to a person who is a tyrant, a traitor or a thief because kindness encourages him to become worse and does not awaken him. The more kindness you show to a liar the more he is apt to lie, for he thinks that you know not, while you do know, but extreme kindness keeps you from revealing your knowledge.˝
(Abdu’l-Baha, Baha’i World Faith – Abdu’l-Baha Section, p. 412)
So when being kind we should not forget other virtues such as justice! As you say it takes a lot of self-control not to say anything and that is showing the utmost kindness but at least this text was for me very liberating!